Tao to be a Messianic 3

When I was 8, I was bullied because of my ugly look.
I was a Christian.
I prayed everyday.  At that time, somehow, I was feeling some existences that were protecting me... I felt it very vividly.  Since I had no friends at all, I was always talking to that "someone".
And I remember that "someone" told me, "Don't believe what they say.  They have no idea what they are doing.  You are a princess of the purple hair.  You will be the bride of the King."  At that time, I said to that someone, "My hair is black not purple..."
One time, I was beaten again, and felt that someone was gone.  I was so sad and cried "Please come back!  Why have you forsaken me?"  I think I cried for 2 or 3 hours.

My mother put me in an English language school.  At that time, it still was a rare thing.  But I hated it.  It was twice a week routine.  For me, it was another addition of misery because I thought I was stupid.  Again, I had no self confidence.
And I was kind of right.  I was not good at English, at all.

After that several hours of crying, I felt very light.  I turned on the TV and watched a program.  And in that program, there was a scenery that showed an English letter as "BABY"... and I pronounced that vocally right there.
I could read "BABY" and I felt, "I can speak English"
Since that day, I speak fluent English.

Tao to be a Messianic 2

So the ugly baby grew up really ugly, my mother was very convinced that she did a very good job to name me as Irene, instead of Meiling that carries the letter of "beauty".

the picture is from my book "Dragon DenDera and Two right hands."
Rei Munakata's book

As a kid, I was suffering from atopic dermatitis.
Tumor on the head wasn't an issue.  I grew big, but the tumor remained in its original size.  Now I still have a mark of it on my head.  Hair doesn't grow on that spot, but I am a female.  I can grow my hair long and cover the mark.
But atopic dermatitis was a great issue for me.
My morning starts with peeling my pajamas off from my skin.
Other kids called me "bacteria" because of the ugliness of the skin.
Bullied, of course.  None wanted to touch me.
For long long time, I struggled because of my ugliness.
None liked me.  I had no friends.

My mother encouraged me to go to church.
She is now a Buddhist.  At that time she used Christianity for the education.  She wanted me to be able to speak English and hoping that I would study abroad.  She thought it would be better for me to know of Christianity because that is the base of the European culture.
I read Bible since I was 5.  Thinking about that, I wasn't a stupid child but at that time, I had zero self confidence.  Everyone made me believe I am the worst failure of the nature.

At the age of 11.  Other girls started talking about boys.  Who is more handsome or prettier and who is crushed on whom....
I was of course, out of any lists.

I wanted to kill myself.

I wanted to end my misery.  I prayed as I was taught in the church and also because I had experienced the deliberation of Holy Spirit when I was 8.  I shall write about it in my next article. Anyway, I prayed to Jesus. (now I never call Him Jesus)
"Lord, please make me pretty.  I will be content if you make me half pretty as much as my mom or please let me die.  I do not want to be beaten or despised anymore."
I don't forget that it was November 24th night.
The next morning... came.  I woke up with a desperation because He didn't take my life.  I started my daily custom of peeling off pajamas.  But it was different.  I didn't have to peel off.
I just naturally took off my pajama.  I still had dermatitis but something was different.  Since that day, my dermatitis began to be cured.

My life was dramatically improved from that day.  In two years from that day, my dermatitis was cured completely.
It was cured as dramatic as I started modeling 10 years later.
It didn't take more than one year for me to realize that my look is not so bad.
This is how I look now...

And this is how I looked two moth after delivering my son.  That is 8 years ago.

Miracle is natural....
Everything is planned by ELOHIM and designed so precisely as it should be.
I think what happened when I was 11 was nothing but His call.
But I was too young to notice.
I failed to stay with Him.

by the time I went to a Christian high school, I realized that I could always be one of the prettiest and what is more, ELOHIM prepared me also with intelligence.
I was significant in my school, first because of my English.  I was always one of the top students of the school also in the study.
ELOHIM gave English to me as "tongue" but He never stopped giving me new languages ever since.
Now I speak 7 languages.
And yet, I failed to stay with Him.  Because I believed that I myself earned it with my own ability.  I believed (so stupidly) that it is matter of course, that I grew pretty because my mother is so beautiful.  I took everything for granted and I praised and admired my own self.
I cannot believe I had forgotten the days of misery so easily.
But it was a trap of Saturn to put me in the worse misery.
How easily I fell, in the hand of Saturn.


Tao to be a Messianic 1.
Tao to be a Messianic 3

Tao to be a messianic. 1

I was born in a far east land.
My mother was a very beautiful woman that holds a letter that means "beauty" in her name.

In the modern history of Asia, there were three famous sisters.
They are called as Soong sisters.

I was about to be named as Meiling, Mary as English name, that holds the letter of "beauty" as my mother's name.
But as soon as my mother saw the new born baby, she had to change her plan.
I was so ugly with a tumor covered half of my face, so yellow because of jaundice and few days after, my skin was covered with eczema.
My mother felt pity she changed her choice of the sister.  Instead of Meiling Soong, who is the wife of general Chiang Kai-shek, she chose Ailing, the first sister, and that name is Irene in English. The name holds a letter means "love".  She prayed through this name so her daughter will be at least lovely despite of her being so ugly.

ELOHIM Leads our lives with endless wonder.  It is Him that Named me as Irene, in Hebrew this name is Salome, Shalomit.
I know this name freaks lots of people out because of the princess Salome who demanded the head of John the Baptist as a pries for her exotic dance.
And this might freak you out.... that I was a professional dancer and I danced in Rome at the presence of Romans for long time.

In this blog, I will write about my fate, my bible study and about my relationship with ELOHIM.
You will find out, by and by, why I do not use that common word "God" and why I call our Savior as  Yehushua, instead of Jesus or Yeshua.
I will write especially about my personal passage to Yehushua HaMassiah in this category of "Tao to be a Messianic"

Dear Adonai ELOHIM,
praise be Thy Name.
Over these 42 years, You Are training me.  I was a sinner.  One of the most terrible sinners, I was.  But You Chose that sinner to show your truth.  I am your media and your peace.
I hereby speak out as your witness.  I testify that You Are alive and expressing your existence through out so many things.
You Prepared me with the ability of the "tongue".  Now You Are typing through the "tongue" and "body" You have prepared to appeal to Your chosen ones.
I know out there, some are laughing.  But for others that are chosen by You, for that are Your "lost lamb", You Will blow that trumpet and they shall rise up from the ashes, up from the tomb.  They will be driven by the code You Hid in their "ladder".
I pray blessings for my brothers and sisters.
Let their ears be opened.  Not because of my poor words but by Your voice, may they move.
In the Holy Name of Yehushua, I pray.
Amen

Tao to be a Messianic 2